Eyes.

Don't act like you know, because you don't.

Do not tell me you love me, do not tell me you are there for me, do not tell me you will not leave.
Do not act like your words can cure this.
Do not look me in these eyes,
and pretend like you know what they have seen.

They have been burned by smoke, damaged by punches, bruised by chambers of guns, thrown to the back of my skull.
They have seen love, and they have shown hatred.
They have seen prosperity, they have seen death.
They have been addicted to people, people they have had to let go of.

They are not colorful, because they have seen color.

This color, it lures girls like you in.
Everybody wants to know the troubled boy with bright eyes,
until they know why he's troubled and what artists of pain have mastered the blend of his soul.

Everybody wants to know the troubled boy with bright eyes,
until they have seen the color within him.

You don't know what these eyes have been through.
You don't understand the tears they've spit on to Earth.
You cannot comprehend what they have lost.

Because everybody wants to know the troubled boy with bright eyes,
until they know how much he hates, how much he loves.

They have seen beauty, too.
Put smiles on peoples faces, captured sights and images,
that have transformed in to memories.
And those images, are the reason these eyes can close at night.

And now you know why I wrote this at 4:57 AM, because they aren't fucking closing tonight.

These eyes are the windows to my soul and my memories have trespassed this house,
they are robbing my happiness.
And everyone begs for the memories to end, but eyes don't forget.

I could never forget.

Death.
Love, that is lost.
Abandoned.
Alone.
Please don't do this tonight, eyes.

Don't remind me of all of what you have seen, I am guilty.
Don't remind me of those gun shots, I am trying to forget.
Don't remind me of those slammed doors, I am not sufficient.
Don't remind me of those moments I fell in love with, I am still in love with them.
Don't remind me, that it was just me, because I am still alone.
Don't remind me, of the times you have been blackened, I was a young boy, I could not be in control.

Please, eyes, do not remind me. 

These eyes, will not turn you in to stone.
These eyes, will not be ones you fall in love with.
These eyes, just don't want another memory.

These eyes, just don't want to spill anymore color inside of me.

These eyes, are colorful, and can you please just leave it at that?
Because these eyes, have seen too much to see much more.

Because everybody wants to know the troubled boy with bright eyes,
until you realize there's a lot more to him than a troubled boy with bright eyes.

Do not fill these eyes, with things that are temporary.
Do not be a memory.
These eyes, they only ask for one wish.
These eyes, just want...
Hope.

Do not act like you know what these eyes have seen, because you don't want to stand across from me forever. 
And do not try to get to know the troubled boy with bright eyes,
because the troubled boy with bright eyes,
is scared
of getting to know you.

Because the troubled boy with bright eyes,
has never lived with security, stability.
The bright eyes only know chaos, eruption.
And the troubled boy with bright eyes,
does not want you to be a part of it.

The troubled boy with bright eyes,
is just that.

A troubled boy, with bright eyes.

​

---